Distinctly Montana Magazine

D I S T I N C T L Y M O N T A N A M A G A Z I N E • S U M M E R 2 0 2 0 38 public, the drawings themselves have faded to the point where they're barely visible. This is all explained in the interpretive displays that illustrate in great detail the original cave art, and where to look to see its faded remnants. Some folks still seem to tour the park expecting, well, something more. Like this disgruntled visitor, who, adding insult to injury, also had to pay the nonresident entrance fee: "The pictographs are so faded or destroyed that you have to use your imagination. The best example is in the sorry excuse of a visitor's center. So, save your $6 state park fee (if you live outside of Montana). If you are a resident of Montana, perhaps it's time to contact your representative and use state funds elsewhere." Okay, let's not bring politics into this, shall we? Some Montana attractions are as bold and breathtaking as the day they were named. Makoshika State Park is a good example. This dramatic badlands jewel on the eastern edge of Montana wows everybody who spends time there. Well, almost everybody. "No water, or clean toilet! Some teenage kids were drinking, pot-smoking, one hella big fire. Run their cars and off-road vehicles through other people's camp. No phone service to call police or park manager. Need to set up some type of cell service out there. Need to set up water buffalo in a few spots. Need police on weekends and holidays. Left at 2AM. Would not ever stay again." We're not entirely sure what this angry camper means by a "water buf- falo," but it's probably a good idea in general to avoid camping anywhere during graduation weekend. Along with the myriad outdoor attractions in Montana, there are hundreds of museums of all types scattered across the state. One complex, the sprawling Range Riders Museum in Miles City, can easily keep the curious tourist occupied for half a day with its arcane collections and dioramas. One visitor, however, seemed to be expecting more, although she generously left two stars after writ- ing this clearly one-star review: "If you can see past the grime, the displays themselves are of limited interest unless you have some idea of what it is all about. A saddle sitting on a log is just a saddle sitting on a log unless you have some idea why it's there." To be fair, no one expects to come away from a pioneer museum struggling on the horns of an existential dilemma. Even Bozeman's Museum of the Rockies, a world-renowned repository of rare dinosaur fossils, occasionally fails to impress: "We went to the museum hoping for an informative and enlightening experience, instead we found an environment of loosely controlled mayhem resembling a daycare facility." Just for the record, Loosely Controlled Mayhem would be a great name for an ironic punk band. And then there's our weather, which is famously unaffected by negative reviews. How many tourists who visit Montana have had their summer vacations completely ruined by the unexpected appearance of an early summer snowstorm? Judging by the online reviews, a lot. With all the information readily available on the in- ternet, there's no excuse for anyone to be unaware that snow can fall here in any month that begins with a capital letter. This disappoint- ed glamper was caught off guard at a Gardiner dude ranch: Yellowstone 1-star reviews www.distinctlymontana.com/reviews203 DISTINCTLY MONTANA | DIGITAL Going-to-the-Sun Road is just an average drive through the mountains. TERRIBLE! Going-to-the-Sun Road

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